All in love // All for love.

Throughout these last five very new months of marriage I've learnt a few things; but the foremost, stereotypical one being how to mold my habits.

I've learned not only the obvious; how to coexist with another person, how to cook for someone other than myself, how to compromise, and read cues of the voice, body language, and sounds. I've learned surface things such as my husbands likes and dislikes I had missed out learning in our four years of long distance dating, how he likes to do things a certain way, or how tired he is after a particularly long shift. But I've also learned about all the other stuff, the beyond surface things, the hard stuff; like what his love and war languages are, and what they look like when they're clashing into mine. I've learned what a Saturday afternoon with him feels like, or how still he sleeps to my always tossing and turning. 

More so, I've learned about me, about my things in relation to his; about my ability to pour gasoline into flames, my fight face, my own love languages, ones I had known about as well as those I had yet to discover in single-me life. I've learned what I feel like in certain situations, what it takes for me to feel or do certain things, what my limits are or what my patience and compromise level is growing into in all the best ways. I've learned the value of my attitudes, the difference between a sharp tongue and gentle word or spirit. I've learned my breaking points and how I can control or soften them, my cool down methods and stubbornness in offering forgiveness. 

All in love. All for love. 

I've learned the value of compromise and weighing a situation. I've learned when to ask, is this really worth fighting for? Is this worth it, tears, anger? Is there another way to resolve this, to let my voice be heard respectfully giving to respectfully receive? Can I quiet my own opinion and listen to another's out of love? Can I humble my and submit myself to the higher importance of a greater accomplishment instead of selfish moments? Am I able to cool down from red to blue, to take a breather and come back with words not decibels?

All in love. All for love.

I have learned.

I have learned great things in a short time. I have strengthened and been broken, my selfishness has yielded it's way to another's in a greater joy of service, respect, and most of all a different kind of love than I have ever know. In just these five months I have learned, we have learned. We have grown where we have been planted. We have reached and stretched, torn and rebuilt.

All in love. All for love.  

"Because marriage means opportunity

To grow in love in friendship.

Because marriage is a discipline

To be added to a list of achievements.

Because marriages do not fail, people fail

When they enter into marriage

Expecting another to make them whole. 

Why Marriage? - Unknown.  

Interesting Reads // Volume 1.

{I've come across some interesting reads I figured I would share!}

Do it yourself? Can I? Should I? Is it worth it?
Or should I just suck it up buy it?

50 things you should stop buying and start making.

My husband is the type of person who would rather just spend the money and buy something. Less trouble and times and aggravation I'm sure he'd say. Me, I'd like to think I'd be okay with spending the time investing into something. SO...I've been recently thinking about making some things and not buying them. Mostly food stuff, but I really would love to get into making my own laundry detergent, bread, and random food items we use frequently like ranch seasonings/taco seasonings etc. I see a few pros to making these: less expensive, less preservatives/unknown chemicals, more quantities to have saved on hand! So why not?
Stay tuned...

I love TED talks.
Seriously, if I could get paid to stay in pajamas and watch TED talks all day I would sign on the dotted line faster than you can say....well you get the picture. So all those 20-somethings, check these out. I've watched about half of them but definitely plan on finding time to hunker down and finish the list.

11 ted talks every 20 something should watch.


I just think this is a valuable read.
And I guess we could all learn to take criticism better.
...No?......Just me?

How are you taking productive criticism? 

I became a we, uniquely.

I'm not entirely sure what my expectations of marriage were before May 31st. 

Regardless, on May 31st 2014, 

I became a "we."

Now, before you get the wrong opinion, being a "we" is a wonderful and fulfilling feeling. It's not at all cause for losing independence or your voice. In fact, I think it may have made me louder to be heard, fight for what I want, and what matters in my book while learning what a respectful compromise looks like.

I became a we on date nights out to the movie asking what we will be seeing. I'm a we telling my hair stylist what we like to do on Saturday nights (catch up on our shows together and make smoothies, duh). I'm not sure I knew how much it would change my life, while at the same time feel so completely familiar, so comfortable and nature. I'm not sure I realized how scared I was, or how much I listened to those stereotypes even as I told myself I wasn't. I'm not sure I fully absorbed the advice everyone gave me, the cautions, or "just you wait until..." I heard all the "don't let him," "don't forget to" and my all-time favorite "just wait until you've been living with that for thirty years."

Aaron Huberty Photography

But the truth is, I was as ready as I would ever be. Much like first time mothers I suppose, I read the books. I knew all the information, all the scenarios, everything you should talk about beforehand (things like finances and fights). I'd heard friends tell me about their hardest or happiest parts of marriage, knowing full well mine may be the same, but most likely completely different. And they have been. Each of those. Yeah, we bicker about the stereotypical things all married couples do, there's a reason those are stereotypes. But we have our own things, our own stuff. Completely unique to us.

We really do have our own share of problems, arguments, victories. And I think my expectations were wrong, that amidst all the advice or cautions, I never realized that my marriage is my own, completely unique to everyone else's in the world.

Aaron Huberty Photography

And maybe, that's what they don't tell you in counseling or in those books. Your marriage is unlike anyone else's in so many ways.

I guess here's the point where you and I both go well...duh.

But hear me out. You both are not just another statistic or stereotype. And they're not "all the same" (okay we know the they I'm talking about and some of the time they really are). Some arguments may be similar to your friends, but they don't fight the same way you do. Or they don't forgive the way you do. My marriage and my home is a joining of two very unique people. We live differently than our friends, we make different choices, we handle problems differently. Though people are similar, couples are similar; every single marriage is different.

And that is okay.

What I'm trying to get at is that my marriage is not that of ten other people giving me advice, my marriage is not my friends' or my parents' marriage, it's not the same as the ones I read in books or see in movies.

And for that, I am grateful. 

I am grateful that I get to live and learn along the way, that I get to do life with this other human being whom I have pledged my heart and my life to. That all of our mistakes and problems are our own, that we get to figure them out along the way, just us. That we know us and know the other person the best way possible, and maybe even sometimes in the worst ways.

But knowing that our marriage is uniquely ours, that we're not a copyright of someone else's

is a refreshing feeling.

Insta-lately.

+ I’ve been back at it in the gym loving it. I love my Polar watch and the motivation of good workouts fueling all the times when I don’t feel like getting off my lazy butt and driving to base.

+ I love the yoga class I take twice a week now. It’s such a fun and interesting workout that makes me feel relaxed and stretched. And hey, I can workout barefoot? Amazing. It’s awesome to feel my progress from week to week, or even class to class in the things I’m now able to do!

+ Our little angel baby bad dog chewed her puppy collar this week. She apparently thought it was time for a big girl one. It took us awhile to try to figure out if she chewed it ON her or pulled it into her crate one morning (it wasn’t on). Freak.

+ Monday was a rough one. God is teaching me something, even if it is just continuously that MY plan is not THE plan. Always teaching me that one. Trying to figure out this passion of mine constantly and what the heck I’m going to do with it. Apparently I’m figuring it out by process of elimination. Such is life, such are circumstances. Sometimes, it really is a paycheck and a learning experience I suppose.

+ On the menu tonight: Crock pot Beef and broccoli with noodles. Husband loved it and even though I’m not a huge beef eater, so did I! Super easy and (mostly) healthy. (I chose to do it with noodles instead of rice and I’m glad). The South doesn’t believe in quality take out chinese food so we’re going to start making our own. So very not the same and I cannot wait to order from our standard place when we visit back home.

+ Speaking of home, my parents came this weekend. I am grateful for our time, for Kevin and my independence, our learning and lessons and the life we’ve built here. I’m proud of us, of myself in so many ways. I guess I really thought I’d fall apart moving here, that it’d be some kind of repeat of freshman year of college and that I’d go wanting to run back to a safe place quick. But really, this has become my safe place. Our home.

+ We waited until we were settled and could put a new address on our Lilly girl’s ID tag to get her an official one (she had a rabies one don’t worry, we’re not that irresponsible). But now our girl’s official and in light of the new collar, a new ID tag was also needed.

Twenty three.

Happy birthday to me! (On September 27th)

My first one married.

My first one in another state.

My 23rd birthday.

My husband spoiled me with an adorable apron, a new candle warmer, cannolis the day before, my favorite Dairy Queen ice cream cake, a Polar fit watch, and surprise horseback riding on my actual day.

Horseback riding was so much fun and made my heart happy. It's been difficult to not have a horse after having Cide for nearly ten years, not to mention been difficult just not being around horse smell and touch and the atmosphere of a barn. I guess horse people understand that one more than ever. 

I love my new Polar watch and have used it often already. It's so motivating and intriguing to see actual data if I'm at yoga class, at the gym or even just walking the dog. I definitely recommend it to anyone. 

Overall, the day was amazing and it was wonderful being able to spend it with my husband for the first time ever in our relationship.

While I did always love getting mushy birthday packages on my birthday, spending the day with him was way better.

Cheers to twenty-three, 

I think it's going to be great!

Our {new} first home!

It baffles me that we have moved on from the apartment we made home for nearly four short months. We didn't our grow it, in reality we would have been perfectly fine fulfilling our lease and our ~first year of marriage in that place before finding a more permanent home here. But with God's provisions and many amazing circumstances we have found a home indeed. We closed on September 18 and moved in a few days later and have quickly and easily felt at home in this place.

And we are so easily in love with our Southern abode. 

Moving was tiresome, but worth it. And with lots of help and the kindness of friends we were able to do it efficiently (after many hours of packing, labeling and color-coding).

We are so looking forward to all the memories we make in this home. 

Busy is an understatement.

We've been getting ready/organizing before moving, attending Doggie Dip Days on base,

(Lilly LOVED it…once she realized she loved it),

running errands, gathering extra cleaning supplies, arranging appointments for carpet cleaners and locksmiths (we close two weeks from today!), looking into questionable VA appraisals (and why it’s now a condition for them to paint the bottom of that outside trim?…whatever military), being social,

making new friends, enjoying the generosity of a military four day family weekend,

starting work, 

continuously training and chasing little fur balls around the house,

…oh and we should be packing too, right?

Life is nutso, but I wouldn’t have it any other way!