What has God been doing in you this week?

Life has been interesting lately, what with Jesus doing work in my heart.

Since being away at school I miss my home church a whole heck of a lot. Over the summer, I started attending a church, nothing like I'd gone to before. It was the first time in a long time I walked out of a service and felt something, like I actually wanted to be there, like I actually got something out of it. I had finally found a church where I wanted to get up on Sunday mornings and attend, where I felt God constantly stirring new things and old things in my heart and soul. I started attending this church in the summer with my best friend and we went regularly. It’s a 'younger' church geared towards a certain demographic. It felt for the first time in a long time like my faith was mine and my choice. Being away at school, the demographic is very different than back home and all four years of college I've struggled finding a church I felt comfortable in, much less one like I finally found at home. I've struggled with pressure to find a church where I fit, where it feels like home. A home within a place that I haven't always felt like home. Since I go to a Christian college and used to live in a dorm we actually call it the “walk of shame” if you're in sweats in the dining hall after church time instead of ‘church clothes.’

I know it's in a harmless way, but still.

In the fall, I started listening to the podcasts from my church at home that I fell in love with over the summer, taking my own notes and having a little bit of my own worship service. It’s difficult, and non conventional, but I'm really okay with it. It’s not a permanent solution and I can't wait to really look for, find and settle into a church when we move. I can't wait to really listen to where God directs us as a newlywed couple, ready and willing to grow in our new environment together. But for now, this works. I'm okay with it.

All that to say....

Sunday I was listening to a podcast from a couple weeks ago on “the attitude of faith.” I wrote on my chalkboard;

"The attitude of faith is that I have the grace to bring the Kingdom of God into every situation."

This is something I struggle with for so many reasons. I struggle with finding my personal faith. I think it’s part of maturing in faith, distancing yours from that of your parents, or friend or inner circles, your tiny private school, your tiny town church family. Sometimes it all just feels so suffocating, so numbly intoxicating. I suppose it's difficult to understand unless you've experienced similar circumstances. I'm continuously hoping to figure out what is my own faith as I grow and how I can voice that in every situation; somehow. Rather than compartmentalize it only to Sundays or circumstances. Something that I've known for what feels like forever, but need a refresher of every once in awhile. I have the grace to bring God into every situation of my life. Because that is faith and that should be my attitude. I should habitually live in the attitude of faith.

“Our beliefs must inform our attitude. If not, there is a disconnect on what you believe versus what your soul believes.” 

I think that God is trying to show me faith. He's showing me that in every circumstance, even as mine change as much as they are recently, I must bring my faith and attitude of faith into everything.

Something that sounds easier than it is.
Stay tuned.